Hygiene. Find it a hassle? Think again.
Believe it, even pigs can be cleaner than most people. With the hot weather of sunny Singapore, it's hard not to walk among a crowd and smell some horrible stench of sweat and dirt. Especially the streets where old man wearing singlets lurk in. So you may ask, why can't this people just spend 10 minutes scrubbing themselves clean with a 1 dollar soap and 9 litres of water. Simple.
Here are 10 reasons why.
- Because they have no time to do so, especially when 23 hrs of the whole day is spent on work.
- Because they are generally homeless.
- Because they have been rolling in mud since their kampong days and apparently do not understand "Personal Hygiene".
- Because they are too lazy to do so.
- Because they are self-deluded and strongly believe they have absolutely no germs on their "clean" bodies.
- Because they have a fetish for being dirty.
- Because they think being dirty is being "manly".
- Because they think being "wild smelling" would give them a better chance of attracting the opposite sex.
- Because they want to be in the "Guiness Book OfWorld Records" for the world's most smelly human, probably even animal. (No hope in competing with the skunk)
- Because they are "Nos. 1 to 9".
( Absolutely no offence meant for the above, it's just for bringing the point across.)
So what do you need to be clean and stop being a scorge of clean ,clean mankind?
Drum roll...
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Bring in the Ministry of Health!!!!....
Besides that, well here are ten more ways you can do to keep yourself be the cleanest human in the world.
- Undertake a personal grooming course, preferably held by the Ministry of Health.
- Love yourself.
- Love the water.
- Love the feeling of water splashing down and cleansing your body.
- Force yourself to scrub your body so hard that you become as red as a lobster.
- With reference to number 5, tell your friends that you have been suntanning at Mauritus and watch them go green with envy.
- Attempt to go into the Guiness Book of World Records(copyright) for being the most hygienic person in the world.
- Grab your old rubber ducky and jump into the filled bathtub, reminiscing about your childhood when you did the same thing.
- Smell your underarms and grimace at the horrific smell that is like a pile of rubbish.
- Compare yourself and a rubbish dump. Be depressed when you see the rubbish is much much nice smelling than yourself and be motivated to clean up yourself.
Come on, get real, is cleaning so difficult?
